Nightmare Sports Parent vs 

AN IDEAL SPORTS PARENT

This is a thumbnail summary of a much larger article at... http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/more-family-fun/201202/what-makes-nightmare-sports-parent

Nearly 75 percent of kids who play organized sports quit by age 13. Some find that their skill level hits a plateau and the game is no longer fun. Others simply discover other interests. But too many promising young athletes turn away from sports because their parents become insufferable.

FIVE SIGNS OF A NIGHTMARE SPORTS PARENT

This is what you want to avoid:
• Overemphasizing sports at the expense of sportsmanship: The best athletes keep their emotions in check and perform at an even keel, win or lose. Parents demonstrative in showing displeasure during a contest are sending the wrong message.

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• Having different goals than your child: Kids generally want to have fun, enjoy time with their friends, improve their skills and win. Parents who... (emphasize) “getting a scholarship” or “making the All-Star team” probably need to adjust their goals.
• Treating your child differently after a loss than a win: "Many young athletes indicate that conversations with their parents after a game somehow make them feel as if their value as a person was tied to playing time or winning,” says Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching LLC.
• Undermining the coach: Kids who listen to their parents yelling instruction from the stands or even glancing at their parents for approval from the field are distracted and can't perform at a peak level. Second-guessing the coach on the ride home is just as insidious.
• Living your own athletic dream through your child: A sure sign is the parent taking credit when the child has done well. “We worked on that shot for weeks in the driveway,” or “You did it just like I showed you” Another symptom is when the outcome of a game means more to a parent than to the child.  

FIVE SIGNS OF AN IDEAL SPORTS PARENT

Here’s what to do:
• Cheer everybody on the team, not just your child: Parents should attend as many games as possible and be supportive, yet allow young athletes to find their own solutions.
• Model appropriate behavior: Contrary to the old saying, children do as you do, not as you say. When a parent projects poise, control and confidence, the young athlete is likely to do the same.
• Know what is suitable to discuss with the coach: The mental and physical treatment of your child is absolutely appropriate. So is seeking advice on ways to help your child improve. Taboo topics: Playing time, team strategy, and discussing team members other than your child.
• Know your role: Everyone at a game is either a player, a coach, an official or a spectator. “It’s wise to choose only one of those roles at a time,” Brown says.
• Be a good listener and a great encourager: When your child is ready to talk about a game or has a question about the sport, be all ears.. Above all, be positive. Be your child's biggest fan. "Good athletes learn better when they seek their own answers," Brown says.

And, of course, don’t be sparing with those magic words: "I love watching you play."